talking to myself

In feeling nostalgic over how the internet was and how it used to be, I decided to go back to my roots: blogging. Or whatever approximation I'll end up doing here, I guess. While I've used Tumblr in a similar way, I feel weird having my stream of consciousness there. Probably because I've used Tumblr for promoting my writing, and my brain's been turned to mush over marketing nonsense like what my "personal brand" is. Also, I tended to write most of my thoughts in the tags when I use Tumblr. Like I'm afraid to actually create a post of my own to say something with my whole chest. God knows why. I dump posts on Tumblr the way people live-tweet on Twitter (or used to, do they still?), but if it's not about a show or movie I'm watching, I suddenly can't own up to what I think. Even though I try not to fall into the trap of crafting my online presence around an aesthetic, or that dreaded and elusive "personal brand", it feels like I have anyway. I might not labour over taking good selfies anymore or partake (often) in the ritual of taking pictures of my food before eating, but I'm clearly (overly) self aware of how I'm perceived online. As if I'm afraid I'll come off like one of those Facebook moms who over share on their statuses. Apparently if you're self-conscious enough, even without showing your face, you too can be afraid of being cringe.

So that's why I'm here. To dump thoughts unpretentiously or as pretentiously as I want in a bid to reclaim the audacity of being a person other people might not agree with or like online.